Mike Robbins shares what he learned from his mother's death

Mike Robbins, author of the books Focus on the Good Stuff and Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken, has written a beautiful piece on Huffington Post about what he learned from his mother's death. Here's an excerpt:

"I'm deeply engaged in my grief process right now -- doing my best to stay present in the midst of the intense and contradictory thoughts and feelings I've been experiencing. While I've been feeling sadness and pain, I also feel a lot of love and appreciation - both for my mother's life and all she taught me, and for the experience of being with her through her death.

Death teaches us so much about life and about ourselves, even though it can be very difficult to comprehend and experience -- especially when the person dying is someone very close to us. As a culture we don't really talk about it, deal with it, or face it in an authentic way. It often seems too scary, mysterious, personal, loaded, heavy, emotional, tragic, andmore.

What if we embraced death -- our own and that of those around us -- in a real, vulnerable and genuine way? What if we lived life more aware of the fact that everyone around us, including ourselves, has a limited amount of time here on earth?

Embracing death consciously alters our experience of ourselves, others and life in a fundamental and transformational way. It allows us to remember what truly matters and to put things in a healthy and empowering perspective. Doing this is much better for us than spending and wasting our time worrying, complaining, and surviving the circumstances, situations, and dramas of our lives, isn't it?"

Click here to read the whole post.

"After Life" on NPR's Radio Lab

In episode 2 of season 6, NPR's Radio Lab explores questions about the after life:

"What happens at the moment when we slip from life...to the other side? Is it a moment? If it is, when exactly does it happen? And what happens afterward? It's a show of questions that don't have easy answers. So, in a slight departure from our regular format, we bring you eleven meditations on how, when, and even if we die." Click here to listen to the story.

Consider the Conversation

Consider the Conversation is a series of films created to "inspire culture change that results in end-of-life care that is more person-centered and less system-centered." Go to www.considertheconversation.org to learn more.

"America's Uneasy Relationship With Death and Dying Goes Back Almost a Century"

Larry Samuel, Ph.D., the author of Death American Style: A Cultural History of Dying in America, has written a fascinating article for Psychology Today. Here's an excerpt:

"The breadth and depth of death as a subject is truly astounding, its cultural history vividly illustrates. Not just the end of life, death is woven into many aspects of it, especially some of its most memorable moments. Indeed, a good number of our seminal, defining experiences have to do with the loss of a loved one; these events often stick with us for the remainder of our own lives. Death is really about life, if you think about it, a constant reminder to make the most of the time we have."

Click here to read more. 

Living funerals

Living funerals are a new alternative to traditional funerals. At a living funeral, family and friends gather to honor a person with a life-limiting illness so that the honoree can hear the eulogies before their death. Read more about living funerals here.

Happier Endings: A Meditation on Life and Death

Erica Brown, author of the new book Happier Endings: A Meditation on Life and Death, answers 5 Questions for USA Today.

NPR: Protecting your digital afterlife

This NPR story begins: "Chances are good that you have hundreds, maybe thousands of e-mails stored on remote servers or in your computer. You might have a Facebook page, or a Tumblr or Twitter account. And you might have countless photos in a Flickr album. All that information amounts to a digital profile of sorts, which raises an interesting question: What happens to that online material when we die?" Intrigued? Listen to the full story. 

NPR: From grief comes a mission to make estate planning less daunting

An NPR feature on widow Chanel Reynolds begins: "Estate planning may seem like a pain, but imagine the mess you leave to those managing your affairs if you don't draw up a will or get life insurance.

'It takes really just a few hours now, rather than a pile of hours and thousands of dollars to do it later when you really need it done,' says Chanel Reynolds, who created a website geared to help people get their affairs in order." Click here to listen and read more...

What Are Death Cafes?

"In the United States, Death Cafes have spread quickly. The first one met last summer in a Panera Bread outside Columbus, Ohio, where guests were served tombstone-shaped cookies. Since then, more than 100 meetings have been held in cities and towns across the country, including Atlanta, Baltimore, Cleveland, Los Angeles and Seattle." What are Death Cafes? Learn more about this new trend on the cover of today's New York Times.

By the way, Toronto's first Death Cafe got a write-up, too.

How to write a eulogy...for yourself

Laurel Lewis is a registered nurse who specializes in end-of-life care. She believes that "contemplating one's own death is a spiritual practice. It can certainly be the focal point of any meditation or journal writing. A Buddhist would say that we should examine it with every breath. That may be much for the beginner. How about we start with twice a day, upon waking and just prior to falling asleep." Read more of this interview with Laurel Lewis here.

You can watch a video of Laurel leading a group through a eulogy exercise below:

Emergency room doctor talks about dying in the 21st century

When Someone Dies: The Practical Guide to the Logistics of Death

On Wisconsin Public Radio's Joy Cardin Show, Scott Smith talked about his book, When Someone Dies: The Practical Guide to the Logistics of Death. From the show's blurb: "All of us will die, but few of us will take the opportunity to prepare for the onslaught of arrangements and special considerations that need to be made when a loved one passes away. This hour, Joy Cardin's guest shares his practical guide for the logistics of death."  You can find the audio for the show in Joy Cardin's archives -- look for 3/27/13 8:00 AM "When Someone Dies".

For a quick and excellent overview of this subject, check the Consumer Reports article "What To Do When a Loved One Dies".

Prepare for a good end of life

Judy MacDonald Johnston gave a great TED talk on preparing for a good end of life. Here's a link to additional reading on the subject of Johnston's talk. And here's her talk:

The nature of life and time as captured in the "Up" and "Before" series

Brett McCracken writes an insightful piece for Mere Orthodoxy on the new movies in the "Before" series and the "Up" series.

If you're not familiar, the "Before" trilogy follows a love story in three films spaced nine years apart that feature the same two actors. We watch these actors age, starting when they meet and fall in love in 1994's Before Sunrise, reunite in Paris is 2003's Before Sunset and negotiate their marriage and lives as the parents of twins in 2013's Before Midnight.

The "Up" series -- which the late Roger Ebert called "the noblest project in cinema history" -- also takes us on a real journey through time. The documentary series began with 7 Up in 1964 and follows fourteen 7-year-old children from diverse socio-economic backgrounds in 1960s Britain. A new documentary has come out every seven years since -- the most recent is 56 Up. 

These movies provide an unusual and revealing look into the nature of life and time. (See also Harry Potter series.)

My Last Days: Meet Zach Sobiech